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| by Stefano Bolognini |
With same-sex marriage such a hot topic in the news, I have been asked frequently about Reform Judaism's position. Answer: The major institutions of Reform Judaism have long been in favor of full civil rights for gay men and lesbians, including the right to civil marriage. In the mid-1990's, both the Union for Reform Judaism and the Central Conference of American Rabbis passed resolutions supporting the cause of same-sex civil marriage. (Available here and here.) The Religious Action Center lobbies on behalf of LGBT rights, including marriage.
The question of whether Reform Judaism supports Jewish marriage (kiddushin) between two men or two women is much trickier. The official position of the Central Conference of American Rabbis is that "the relationship of a Jewish, same gender couple is worthy of affirmation through appropriate Jewish ritual." But should that ritual be called "marriage?" Here, Reform rabbis still disagree. The CCAR's Responsa Committee (for answering Jewish legal questions) voted 7-2 against granting same-sex relationships the status of marriage. (The committee's opinions are advisory, not binding.) Currently, the CCAR affirms each rabbi's individual choice whether and how to officiate at rituals for same-sex couples. This is similar to the position on officiation at interfaith weddings, which is also left to the decision of individual rabbis.
Personally, I am among the rabbis who believe that kiddushin—the rite of Jewish marriage—is the appropriate ritual for sanctifying and celebrating the relationships of same-sex couples. I officiate at those ceremonies with the same awe and joy I feel any time I am priveleged to join a couple beneath the chuppah. And I am grateful to be part of a congregation that respects my choice in what is still, for many, such a fraught and controversial question.
For now, I am just thrilled to be the rabbi of one more happy, married couple. Mazal tov, Howard and Don! L'chayim!
I'm new to the WHC blog, so I spent a few minutes looking over the past blog postings. I was very please to to see that WHC had/hosted it's first same sex marriage. I was a little surprised that there was no comments -maybe the comments came via regular mail, phone calls, or direct conversations:all undoubtedly for and against.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter's bat mitzvah was 18 years ago, and I still remember Rabbi Lustig's words about respecting and accepting "the others". We of course have a long tradition of being "others". We should always be mindful of our heritage and our responsibility to enable others to reach their full potential, without prejudice or impairment for their difference. Certainly we, all of us, have more in common with "others" than any observed difference.
I salute Rabbi Lustig. I have attended one of his weddings and commented verbally and in writing that his service made me proud to be a member of WHC. Reading this posting by him about a same-sex marriage, fills me with respect,joy, and pride for our professional staff and our congregation.
We are indeed blessed.